Through Him Or In Him?

"O LORD, thou hast searched me, and known me."  (Psalm 139:1 KJV)

I saw my doctor last Friday—it was supposed to be a normal visit for blood work, period.  Because we don’t have medical insurance, my doctor has been great just to peek in the exam room, ask a few quick questions and, as he puts it, “pretend he didn’t see me” so he wouldn’t have to charge for the visit. 

Unfortunately, things changed and I ended up with an extended examination and consultation about some serious symptoms I’ve been experiencing for quite some time but unable to talk openly about.  In all honesty, I struggle with allowing people to know about my pain because of the possibility of rejection or being made to feel like a chronic complainer or someone desperate for attention or pity.

But, I’m not alone!  There are many people who go through life thinking there is no way anyone could ever truly know them and still love them. It’s even worse for those of us with illnesses—many times we don’t want to show our weaknesses to others.  And sometimes we treat God the same way…we have trouble being open and honest with Him thinking we’re a bother or perhaps we deserve our pain because of something we may have done or neglected to do.

We can’t hide anything from God.  He knows us better than we know ourselves.  He loves us more than we could ever imagine though He knows us completely.  He knows what we need before we pray. He knows and understands our suffering. He never misunderstands us…there is nothing about us He doesn’t know.

Take a few moments today and consider these things.   If you’re hiding shortcomings or failures, talk to Him about them.  If you’re unable to articulate your pain, just open up and tell Him as plainly as you can. After all, He made you who you are—fearfully and wonderfully made, by His hands and for His glory.

Are you hiding FROM Him or are you hidden IN Him? 

Prayer:  Father, it is so hard sometimes for me to comprehend the love you have for me.  Forgive me for hiding FROM You; help me to live hidden IN You.  Amen.



Jan Ross lives in Willard, OH, with her husband, Ron; they have six adult children and twelve incredible grandchildren.  Jan is an ordained minister and missionary with Heart of God International Ministries (  She enjoys teaching and writing Bible Studies and teaching piano.  Jan continuously experiences God’s strength being made perfect in her weakness from fibromyalgia, psoriatic arthritis and other chronic conditions.  Feel free to contact Jan at