“The Lord said to Moses, ‘Tell Aaron and his sons, “This is how you are able to bless the Israelites. Say to them: ‘The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace'”‘” (Numbers 6:22-26).
I said goodbye to my primary care doctor. He is moving south to operate a satellite office of a major hospital. It was an opportunity too good to pass. I am genuinely happy for him; but with this change comes apprehension for me.
People dealing with chronic conditions know that when we find a competent, caring doctor we hold on tightly to them.
I have known this doctor for twenty-one years, fresh out of medical school. I saw several physicians in the practice at that time, but on December 30, 2010 he became my primary doctor. It was my 12th wedding anniversary. I had suffered with migraines and dizziness all of December and ended up with this doctor on my second sick visit in four days.
After determining I was severely dehydrated he pumped two bags of fluids into me and remarkably I felt better. This was my first of many experiences with intravenous therapy.
The appointment was pivotal as he put me on a three-week sick leave. We did not know then that my autonomic nervous system was misfiring. In the subsequent months, as my health spiraled downward, this doctor never lost hope of helping me. In fact, he apologized early on for not knowing what was wrong; how to treat me.
We persevered together. Since that day, I have had 56 office visits. Of that number 48 were with him.
He stuck with me from the beginning– he learned more about dysautonomia than he ever probably wanted to. He listened. He reassured when I was fearful and encouraged me to get a pacemaker. And we talked about God.
I am leery about finding a new doctor, but I will do two things to hopefully gain another amazing primary care physician. I will meet several doctors and see how they operate. And I will trust God to lead me to the proper provider. Just like He did so many years ago.
Prayer: Dear Lord, help us to remember to trust in You and know that You guide us in our decisions. Amen.
About the author:
Laura Seil Ruszczyk lives in New York with her husband of 27 years and three children. She is a retired elementary school counselor who currently runs a HopeKeepers group at her church. She has dysautonomia, the deregulation of the autonomic nervous system. The autonomic nervous system controls such invisible functions as heart rate, blood pressure, breathing and temperature regulation.
How do you handle change?