”So do not throw away your confidence, it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised: (Hebrews 10:35-36).
Confidence is reliance on one’s circumstances; a certainty; a belief that one will act in the proper way.
When I look at that definition I grimace. At times, my body does not emit confidence.
With a broken autonomic nervous system I am confident/sure my blood pressure could be anywhere on the spectrum; my hands may turn purple; and a myriad of other things may happen.
But am I certain that I can rely on my body when I need to for big events? Hardly.
But here is the interesting spin to this uncertainty: I don’t get as nervous or scared about whether my body will perform the way I want it to. Rather I prepare the best I can for an event.
In my situation it means pacing my activities; drinking fluids ( perhaps scheduling intravenous fluids around an event as that is part of my weekly routine), praying, exercising, eating the best I can, and resting.
I also try to enter a situation with a plan of where to go if I need to exit for some reason. And then I enjoy the experience; marvel at what I am doing, whom I am with, and what we are doing.
I don’t expect the experience to be flawless–symptoms will occur–but hopefully I will manage. If not, I usually know how to handle such.
Of course there is sadness of what I cannot do; some days the word chronic becomes daunting; but more so I try to relish the good.
Confidence can be shaken, certainly. But people with chronic illness have great courage, endurance. And with God all is possible.
Prayer: Dear Lord, thank You for giving us confidence to persevere despite all the challenges we face. Your love for us is a guiding light in our lives. We are blessed to find comfort in Your word. Amen.
About the author:
Laura Seil Ruszczyk lives in New York with her husband of 26 years and her three children. She is a retired elementary school counselor who currently runs a HopeKeepers group at her church. She was diagnosed with dysautonomia four years ago–the deregulation of the autonomic nervous system.
How do you garner confidence when it is shaken?
This is Jeremy Camp singing “Even When.” It is a reminder to us that even when God doesn’t make sense, even when our plans get cancelled–whatever it is we don’t understand, we can choose to trust
and praise God even then. It is the hardest thing we may ever have to do… But God promises it will be worth it. -Lisa