What Might God Say to Me As I Struggle with Illness

god-sayWhat would God say to you today if He sat down with you and looked into your eyes? Jackie shares.

“When Moses came down from Mount Sanai with the two tablets of the testimony [Ten Commandments] in his hands, he was not aware that his face was radiant because he had spoken with the Lord” (Exodus 34:29).

Not long ago I felt a nudge to add a new method to my journaling–I decided not to just write whatever was on my heart, but to write what I imagined God would say to me.

Kind of excited, I went down to the bookstore and bought a new pale blue journal with a precious bluebird perched on white peonies with a blush of pink on the ruffled tips. After a few entries in my new journal, I am amazed at what a blessing this practice already is.

Just the other day I had a Sjogren’s Disease flare-up. I wrote what I thought God would say…

My dear Jackie,

I know you are disappointed today. I know how much you looked forward to going to the dinner at church tonight. I’m also aware of how you hate to call and cancel anything–it goes against your grain.

I’m aware of how badly you feel–that your arms feel like two cement blocks are weighing them down, and you don’t have the energy to walk to the mailbox.

Dear one, I’m proud of you though, for you don’t blame me–you still cherish our communion, you still look for those “bouquets of roses”–little gifts I leave along your path just for you.

Don’t despair. I will always leave you gifts, for you are a gift to me. Run into my arms and feel me lifting up your heavy, tired arms. I hold you tightly to my breast. I love you with an inconceivable love.

Your Abba

Isn’t that awesome? I believe this new addition to my journaling is going to be priceless.

There are so many ways to connect with our Lord–maybe you’d like to try this one. As I go back and read these daily writings I feel like Moses, whose face was radiant because He and the Lord had spoken.

Prayer: Oh, Our Father, thank You for the many ways you speak to us–the wisdom You give, the guidance, and above all how You personalize the way You lead us. Amen.

About the author:
Jackie Smith is from Knoxville, TN near the beautiful Smoky Mountains. She struggles with Sjogren’s Disease and migraine headaches. Jackie had a bilateral mastectomy over 25 years ago. A few years ago she had her colon removed, necessitating a permanent ileostomy. She has her master’s degree in Child and Family Studies. Between her and her husband of 35 years there are 5 children and 12 grandchildren who provide much joy. Jackie loves sharing the rich experiences God has lavished upon her.

What do you think God would say to you today?

What would God say to you today? This video, a Father’s Love Letter, is a beautiful example of just a few of the things He wants you to know… -Lisa