“Such confidence we have through Christ before God. Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God. He has made us competent as ministers of a new covenant–not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life” (2 Corinthians 3: 4-6).
Inadequate: lacking the quality required, insufficient for a purpose. Incapable, inept, substandard, inferior.
Inadequate. Pretty harsh, but that is the word that has been flashing through my mind recently.
I have been feeling inadequate as a parent as stressors have crept into our lives and I wonder whether I would handle them differently if healthy. Or worse yet, would we even have these stressors if my body was stronger?
Not that my illness caused anything, but if I was working, carrying on a “normal life” would my family be more “normal?” If we all left the house at 7:15 a.m. like we did before my illness, would we be stuck in a maze of confusion, trying to find solutions that are not yet coming?
My counselor-brain of 23 years tells me my reasoning is faulty, but I wonder.
“We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed” ( 2 Corinthians 4: 8-9).
I continue to persevere, looking for resolutions to this latest struggle. I have sought assistance from God and others. But honestly, I have been frustrated by the snail-paced results shown.
“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” (2 Corinthians 4: 16-18).
It is difficult to not lose heart and wallow in inadequacy when we are challenged. But God’s Word tells us He is with us on our journey wherever it may lead. This does hold comfort.
Prayer: Dear Lord, please help us when we are discouraged to persevere and find comfort in the knowledge that You walk this journey with us. Amen.
About the author:
Laura Seil Ruszczyk lives in New York with her husband and three children. She is a retired elementary school counselor who discovered her love of writing about 35 years ago. Laura is the disability/chronic illness advocate for her church and also enjoys running a HopeKeepers group. She is writing a book about her illness, dysautonomia: the deregulation of the autonomic nervous system. She had a pacemaker implanted in October 2013 as a result of dysautonomia slowing her heart rate.
Has illness left you feeling inadequate at times? If so, how do you find comfort in God’s words?
It is hard to feel brave when our inadequacies taunt us, isn’t it? Thankfully, we can have faith that in our weaknesses God uses His strength. This is why we can be brave! This song, “Brave” with Nichole Nordeman is a great reminder about where our true strength and hope to face tomorrow comes from. I hope you are blessed. -Lisa