When you are missing an intimate connection with God, are there other ways He may be reaching out? Jackie shares.
“He has taken me to the banquet hall and His banner over me is love.” (Song of Solomon 1:14)
I was deathly ill as a result of surgery for an abscess after my non-functioning colon was removed. Shortly after the surgery I experienced a two-week state of delirium. The devastating nightmares were extremely frightening. Between the removal of my colon and the abscess, I was in the hospital for a total of 10 weeks and had six surgeries due to complications.
Returning home from a month’s stay in the hospital, I couldn’t feel the presence of God like I was used to. I felt so desolate and lonely without Him. I read scripture or one of my many encouraging books on God’s presence. My prayers seemed to go nowhere.
As I explained the depth of my sorrow to a friend, he wisely advised not to force a quiet time or prayer because God understood. He said that God was showing Himself to me in the avalanche of cards, phone calls, meals and support from friends and family.
Soon, with this new insight, I began to feel comforted that God actually was reaching out to me. Out of the peace, I decided to just wait for Him to restore me to joy. Gradually, He filled my heart with the graciousness of His presence. “He (took) me to the banquet hall and His banner over (me was) love” (Song of Solomon 1:14).
There are times we can’t reach Him for some reason or the other; however, we can trust Him through His incomprehensible love to seek us out. As we abandon ourselves to Him just as we are, He will be faithful to restore the relationship with delightful joy on His part and ours.
Prayer: When I feel cut off from You, let me wait on Your faithfulness to reveal Yourself to me. Amen.
About the author:
Jackie Smith lives at the foot of the magnificent Smoky Mountains in Knoxville, TN. She has Sjogren’s Disease and migraines. Jackie is grateful to be a survivor of a bilateral mastectomy over 25 years ago. A few years ago she had to have her colon removed, necessitating an ileostomy. Jackie received her master’s degree in Child and Family Services. While she has never been able to work using her degree, it’s been an asset with her husband, 5 children and 12 grandchildren. Her writing about God’s exuberant love is one of her greatest joys.
Do you have desolate times when you can’t feel God? Can you just wait for Him to make the first move, trusting His faithfulness to do so?
In this song, “I Celebrate the Day” Reliant K sings about how Christmas can make such a difference. Not the day, per se, but what God did that would forever change our lives. The lyrics share, “And from a lack of my persistenc-y (sic) we’re less than half as close as I want to be. . .” You may enjoy reading the lyrics here http://www.plyrics.com/lyrics/relientk/icelebratetheday.html I hope you enjoy. -Lisa