Have you ever had someone walk up to you and ask, “Don’t I know you?” Maybe they seem a bit familiar to you, too, but neither of you can really figure out where you might have know each other. Or maybe you do, and then have a great time reliving the past.
Lately I feel that some of those in my family or circle of friends might be able to say the same thing to me. I’m sure they look at me and think back to who and what I used to be, and wonder, “Is this really the same person I knew way back when?” Even though, at first I tried to explain, they somehow just didn’t get it.
Why can’t you go shopping with me? (I think, “Because I don’t even have the strength to fix a meal for my husband.”)
Why can’t we go on an overnight mini-trip like old times? (I think, “Because of the bleach, fabric softener, cleaning supplies, and so on that have been used in the sheets, towels, etc. Or maybe because of the scented candles and flowers sitting around that cause uncontrollable coughing and swelling of my lips, tongue, throat, etc.”)
Why don’t you ever come to visit anymore? Why do I have to always come to your house? (I think, “Because my eyesight is so dim I am afraid I will put, not only my own life in danger while driving, but the lives of others.”)
I could go on and on with the list, but I know some of you would think the same way, and even have your own reasons “why you can’t!” I don’t usually give these types of answers to people anymore. I just tell them that maybe another time would be better for me, if they will be available.
Even after all these years, and trying to explain at first, I know that people don’t understand unless they are “walking in my shoes” so to speak. People such as all of you who are reading this devotional. Oh, how grateful I am to be able to share with you open and honestly, and to know I won’t be criticized or taken in the wrong way!
But, I AM the same person I have always been! In most ways I even look like the same person, fashioned by the Master Potter’s own hands. I have just been dropped and broken into pieces that God is putting back together in another fashion. And, I have His blessed assurance that He is reforming me into a vessel that can still be used to praise Him, and to give Him all glory and honor. I just have to be willing, even while living in pain and with limitations.
No, I guess people don’t really know me anymore. I don’t feel like know myself most of the time. It can get pretty frustrating and lonely at times. But, as long as I keep my eyes on Jesus, and take time to sit in His presence, I know He will see me through every valley.
HE KNOWS ME! And, He loves and accepts me just as I was, just as I am, and will love me for whatever I become – as long as I show Him I love Him back.
Prayer: Thank you, Father for “really knowing me,” and loving me through all circumstances.
About the Author:
Alice Ervin lives with Fibromyalgia, Degenerative Arthritis, Chemical Sensitivities, and other chronic illnesses. She does so with the help of her beloved husband and friends who are always willing to help in any way they can. Most of all, she is helped by, and is thankful for the constant presence and comfort of her Savior, Jesus Christ.
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