Getting Better

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” (Psalm 23:4 NIV)

After my baby died, I felt stuck for a long time. Stuck in a time warp, stuck in sadness, stuck in confusion about why it had happened.

But as sure as I was crying out to God, and as sure as He was answering, I still couldn’t hear Him through my tears. I didn’t feel I was making progress in my grief.

So when others would ask me if I were getting “better,” I never knew how to answer. Did they really mean, “Are you less sad?” or “Are you missing your little girl less?” or “Are you getting used to having her gone?”

No, no, and no.

Grief takes time, usually more time than we’d like, and more time than others expect.

Neither do I know how to respond now when friends ask about my physical pain, “Is it better?” No, it’s not better, if you really mean, “Is it less?” And it probably never will be, in this life.

But am I learning to live with it better? Am I finding joy, even in the midst of the pain? Am I progressing towards contentment?

Yes, yes, and yes.

Because the Perfect Guide leads us, we are getting “better.” Because the Lord is our shepherd, we have no lack-whether in times of plenty or in times of want, in times of pain or in times of no pain.

While we may never enjoy or even get used to our road of pain, we can find peace because of our divine companion, knowing that the Lord and His provisions are enough.

I did find joy again after my baby’s death, even though it took longer than I wished. The next time I see her, neither one of us will be in pain. That truth makes accepting the other truths in my travels a little bit easier.

Dear Lord, Even in our pain, sometimes because of our pain, let us open our arms wide enough to accept Your presence with us. We are grateful we never walk this path alone.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Lisa Burgess currently lives in Alabama with her husband and youngest teenage daughter, but looks forward to living in Heaven later with her entire family. She welcomes you to share your journey with her at lisanotes.blogspot.com.

6 thoughts on “Getting Better

  1. DEAR LISA:HELLO,THIS IS TOM FROM R.M. I JUST READ YOUR BLOG ON “GETTING BETTER”.I FELT I HAD TOO COMMENT ON IT AS I HAVE GREIVED ALSO OVER THE LOSS OF MY FATHER.THIS TOO WHILE DEALING WITH THE CHRONIC PAIN OF RSD/CRPS AND OTHERS.IT IS VERY HARD TOO JUST GET OVER THE LOSS OF SOMEONE SO DEAR TOO YOU.MY MOTHER DIED WHEN I WAS 1AND HALF YEARS OLD.SO MY FATHER AND I WERE VERY CLOSE.I STILL THINK ABOUT HIM.IT`S BEEN SIX YEARS NOW.BUT LET ME SHARE SOMETHING WITH YOU THAT WILL LIFT YOU UP.WHEN MY FATHER GOT SICK THE LAST TIME .WE WERE IN THE E.R. WAITING TOO GO UPSTAIRS AND GET A ROOM.DAD WAS ALMOST 80 AND HAD A HISTORY OF HEALTH PROBLEMS AFTER 70.HE ASKED ME TOO PRAY .I WAS STUNNED AS WE BATTLED OVER BEING SAVED AND RELIGION, ETC.SO I SAID HOW ABOUT THE SINNERS PRAYER ?.SO HE ACCEPTED THE LORD RIGHT THERE.THAT WAS THE LAST TIME HE WAS CONCIOUS BEFORE HE PAST AWAY 10 DAYS LATER.NOW I TOO WILL SEE HIM IN HEAVEN WHEN WE BOTH WILL BE OUT OF PAIN.ISNT THAT AWESOME?GETTING SAVED AT 80?JUST THOUGHT I WOULD SEND THAT YOUR WAY LISA.THANK YOU FOR THE DEVOTION.GOD BLESS YOU AND YOURS ,TOM

  2. Lisa, I can only imagine how terrible it would be to lose a baby.

    The closest I can come is remembering losing a dear little premie to double pneumonia while nursing during a night shift. I still remember how sad and alone I felt as I took his small wrapped body down to the morgue in the hospital. I thought of the mother an father, especially the former and wept for them.

    But your words still resonate with me. I found your piece affirming and encouraging. It helps so much to know you’re not alone whether you’re grieving the loss of a loved one or the loss of health.

    Thank you. ♥

  3. Tom: Thanks for sharing that experience. What a privilege you had to lead your very own father to the Lord. And what a reunion you’ll have one day!

    Blessings!
    Beth

  4. Lisa,

    Your words touch my heart as they are from your heart.

    You share so beautifully about the parts of our journeys that are so inward. Others long to help but often can’t understand. There are so many levels of loss we each go through differently.

    It reminds me of Tim’s book, “Through the Wilderness of Loneliness”. The deeper levels are the ones we make with God alone.

    Bless you!
    Love,
    Lynn

  5. Tom–what a beautiful story! Thank you for sharing it. I’m one that loves to watch reunions at airports–I can’t imagine the reunions in heaven that we’ll see!

    Beth and Lynn–you are both such encouraging women. Blessings to you on using your gifts so positively.

    Lisa

  6. Pingback: Are you getting better?

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