Getting Better

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” (Psalm 23:4 NIV)

After my baby died, I felt stuck for a long time. Stuck in a time warp, stuck in sadness, stuck in confusion about why it had happened.

But as sure as I was crying out to God, and as sure as He was answering, I still couldn’t hear Him through my tears. I didn’t feel I was making progress in my grief.

So when others would ask me if I were getting “better,” I never knew how to answer. Did they really mean, “Are you less sad?” or “Are you missing your little girl less?” or “Are you getting used to having her gone?”

No, no, and no.

Grief takes time, usually more time than we’d like, and more time than others expect.

Neither do I know how to respond now when friends ask about my physical pain, “Is it better?” No, it’s not better, if you really mean, “Is it less?” And it probably never will be, in this life.

But am I learning to live with it better? Am I finding joy, even in the midst of the pain? Am I progressing towards contentment?

Yes, yes, and yes.

Because the Perfect Guide leads us, we are getting “better.” Because the Lord is our shepherd, we have no lack-whether in times of plenty or in times of want, in times of pain or in times of no pain.

While we may never enjoy or even get used to our road of pain, we can find peace because of our divine companion, knowing that the Lord and His provisions are enough.

I did find joy again after my baby’s death, even though it took longer than I wished. The next time I see her, neither one of us will be in pain. That truth makes accepting the other truths in my travels a little bit easier.

Dear Lord, Even in our pain, sometimes because of our pain, let us open our arms wide enough to accept Your presence with us. We are grateful we never walk this path alone.

Lisa Burgess currently lives in Alabama with her husband and youngest teenage daughter, but looks forward to living in Heaven later with her entire family. She welcomes you to share your journey with her at